I am a 33 year old female who has been divorced for 10 months. For the past 6 years, I was employed as a legal secretary at a gr8 place, but due to the current economic climate, was recently retrenched. This saddened me as I really loved my job and enjoyed the ppl I worked with. I signed up with a temping agency, who found me a 6 week assignment at a law firm, whilst their regular employee was on leave. My role was working for one of the newly appointed, senior partners. On my first day there, it was hectic, but due to my experience, felt that I coped quite well. It was also in the back of my mind that I would need to do this role well, if I wanted any future work with this agency. My boss was a quite nice looking man in his early 50’s. He treated me well. The culture of the office was unlike my last job, as all of the legal secretaries there were in their early to mid 50’s, & it seemed as if I was the youngest secretary there. After about a week, I took some calls from the wife of my boss, I noticed her abruptness over the phone. The other staff informed me that her abruptness was ‘typical’, and I wasn’t to feel bad about it. Noticing that my boss was on the phone one day taking a call from his wife, I quietly began to move out of the office, but he motioned for me to stay. He became very ‘compliant’, I noticed, whilst speaking to her “yes dear, no dear, anything you say dear’. After he put the phond down, he looked at & sighed. I just smiled back. This seemed to ‘break the ice’ between us and the next day, he invited me out to lunch with some other colleagues (law partners) of his. It was then that I started noticing him payig me compliments – eg how I dressed, how my tone of voice over the phone was fluid & wonderful, and what a gr8 worker I was. I was very flattered by his attention and knew that it would get back to the temping agency. Then, one day when near a lift, I accidently dropped my cell phone, and we both ‘dived’ for it, narrowly missing our heads. We both laughed, but I couldn’t help noticing that he was peering down my shirt, which, due to my recent weight loss, is slightly too baggy for me. It was after this incident, that I noticed him ‘eyeing’ me up and down, whenever I came near him. Now, just so you don’t get any wrong ideas, I don’t wear seductive clothing to work, just business like clothing, however, I do enjoy wearing very, very, high stilettos, which he remarked on one day, a comment like:”How do you walk in those things?”, I just laughed. One day during after a meeting in which I took the minutes, I asked him a question, after everyone had left & he reassuringly, placed his hand on my thigh. I wasn’t fazed by this, as I felt he was a gr8 boss. On my last day, some of the secretaries organised some drinks after work, and we (including my boss), went to the local bar for “Happy Hour”. We partied on for a few hours, then most left, except for my boss. We began to talk & chat. Now, I know this may sound stupid, but I am worried about my economic status, as a single woman without a regular income & a mortgage. I felt my boss was ‘hitting’ on me, and although I’ve never done this before, suggested we get a motel room. I then told him, what I thought was an appropriate amount of money to be exchanged for a full service, and, to my amazement, he agreed!! We walked to a nearby motel room, & he paid with his Gold Amex Card. Once in the room, after we had ordered some champagne, I removed my clothes, his clothes, & began to kiss him. He became aroused quickly, and we ‘did the deed’. He was so relieved that tears welled up in his eyes as he came. We were on the bed, facing a mirror, & rather than being repulsed, I actually felt very, very, powerful and in control. Afterwards, he assisted me to reach climax by performing fellatio. I felt wonderful, and I made about 1.5 day’s wages, in 2 hours! We spoke afterwards, & he informed me that it was the greatest sex he’d had in 15 years, that his wife had refused him sex for 10 years, and although initially would, give him a hand/ b job, hadn’t for close to 8 years. He’d been getting by simply by using his hand & porn. He then made wonderful comments on my technique, my body (still firm), my pelvice floor muscles, (tight), my hair, etc and I felt, once again, powerful. He even stated that he enjoyed the way I kissed him, as his wife had long ago ceased to french-kiss him passionately. He even stated that she had never allowed him to pleasure her & would physically ‘push’ him away, which I fail to understand – surely, receiving this from a man is a gift? He then informed me that he was only in the marriage due to his kids & of what he could lose, financially. Now, I understand all the lies, etc, men will say & would never, want a relationship with this man, however, as I explained, I just saw an opportunity, which had been building up for weeks, to use his attraction & sexual neediness to my advantage. He then
Please, I need serious answers – I feel a bit wrong for doing this.